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Could you be my answer...

....Could you tell me that I am

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Kelli
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August 28th, 2007

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"There will come a time where you're infatuated,
with a single soul. For this person, you'd do anything,
and not think twice about it. But when asked why,
you have no answer. You'll try your whole life to
understand, how he can affect you as much as he
does. But you'll never find out, & no matter how badly
you hate it, or how much it hurts, you will care for this
person without regrets, for the rest of your life."



Find someone who you can love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back -Meet Joe Black (1998)

Look at her, she's smiling, but is she happy? She's smiling, so it doesn't matter. Let me tell you something. Things aren't always as they seem -Mona Lisa Smile (2003)

I wish I had a different life, I wish I was braver and prettier or just happy. But it's useless to dream, because nothing ever changed -My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

No one knows why some things work out and some things don't. -Notting Hill (1999)

"No matter what you say about love
I keep coming back for more
Keep my hand in the fire
Sooner or later I get what I'm asking for

No matter what you say about life
I learn every time I bleed
The truth is a stranger
Soul is in danger I gotta let my spirit be free
To admit that I'm wrong and then change my mind
Sorry but I have to move on and leave you behind

I can't waste time so give it a moment
I realized nothings broken
No need to worry about everything I've done
Live every second like it was my last one
Don't look back got a new direction
I loved you once needed protection
You're still a part of everything I do
You're on my heart just like a tattoo
Just like a tattoo"
Tattoo-Jordin Sparks
"You can choose who you talk to, you can choose who you talk about. But you have absolutely no control over who occupies your thoughts."

"Why did I let myself believe
Miracles could happen
Cause now I have to pretend
That I don't really care"

"Don't wanna leave it all behind
But I get my hopes up
and I watch them fall everytime
Another colour turns to grey
and it's just too hard to watch it all
slowly fade away
I'm leaving today 'cause I've
gotta do what's best for me"

"A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left."

"The only thing keeping me here,
is not knowing where else to go."

"I was just nowhere near your neighborhood"

"All I can do is hope that it gets better. You can't miss something that was never really there"

"I know there will never be a time when you'llsame. in that moment, i felt my heart break. somehow & painfully i was sure, my life would continue. with or without you, right?"


"she talks about you
like you put all the stars in the sky"

"Do you ever feel like you're working
for something you're never going to get?
You shoot and miss kind of deal
like, no matter what, you can't have it,
but that makes you fight for it just a little bit more?"

"it's like all of the bad stuff that you
went through, that you hated along
the way; the people who disappointed
you, the things that didn't go the way
you wanted; suddenly you feel grateful
for them, because those are the things
that got you here, to this" -- The Perfect Man

"Quotes get you through the days that you think no one knows what you're going through."

"Cute is when a person's personality shines through their looks. Like in the way they walk, every time you see them you just want to run up and hug them." -Natalie Portman

Stop planning your life and let it plan itself. Quit trying to find the perfect boy & let him find you. If you don't want drama, then don't talk shit. Things are only as complicated as you make them. - Grey's Anatomy

"You can make the future but it starts with leaving the past"


"Too often, the thing you want most is the one thing you can't have"

When all you're dreams come true, who do you want beside you? –One Tree Hill

"this summer i learned many things about myself
i learned just how drunk i could get
i learned that breathing salty air is good for the soul
and who my real friends are
but most of all, i learned that i could live without you
you, who i thought i could not live without at all"

"So many people enter and leave your life.
hundreds and thousands of people.
you have to keep the door open so they can come in but that also means you have to let them go.."

August 24th, 2007

I absolutely LOVE Paramore::

"I can't decide
You have made it harder just to go on
And why, all the possibilities where I was wrong"

"
I still try holding onto silly things, I never learn.
Oh why, all the possibilities I'm sure you've heard.
That's what you get when you let your heart win, whoa"

"
And when it rains,
Will you always find an escape?
Just running away,
From all of the ones who love you"

"
Take these chances to turn it around
You can take your time, take my time."

"
A memory remains just a tiny spark.
I give it all my oxygen,
So let the flames begin."

"
Somewhere weakness is our strength,
And I'll die searching for it."


"
When this memory fades
I'm gonna make sure it's replaced"

"
We've learned to run from
Anything uncomfortable
We've tied our pain below and no one ever has to know
That inside we're broken"

"I'm not going
cause I've been waiting for a miracle
And I'm not leaving
I won't let you
Let you give up on a miracle
When it might save you"

"
I just need this pain to end right here"

"
Cause I'd rather waste my life pretending
Than have to forget you for one whole minute"

"
Keep me safe inside
Your arms like towers
Tower over me"

"
Lock the doors
Cause I like to capture this voice"

"
You're always on display
For everyone to watch and learn from,
Don't you know by now,
You can't turn back
Because this road is all you'll ever have.
And it's obvious that you're dying, dying."

"
It takes some time to let you go and it shows."

"
Some things I'll never know
And I had to let them go
I'm sitting all alone feeling empty"

"
So this is how it goes
Well I, I would have never known
And if it ends today
Well I'll still say that you shine brighter than anyone"


"
Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you
We could sing our own but what would it be without you?"


"
I can't keep my heart from singing
along to the sound of your song
Can't someone stop this song,
so I won't sing along"


"
Your lovesick melody
is gonna get the best of me tonight
But you won't get to me if I don't sing"


"
Your verse got trapped inside my head
Over and over again
You played yourself to death in me"



"
Maybe if my heart stops beating
It won't hurt this much"


"
I'll wave goodbye
Watching you shine bright
I'll wave goodbye tonight"

August 15th, 2007

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"Today was just one of those days where everything
 I did reminded me of you .. every song I heard some how
related to you... I hate days like today"

"Sometimes you look back on a situation, and you realize it wasn't all you thought it was. a beautiful boy walked into your life. you fell hard, or did you? maybe it was only childish infatuation or a brief moment of insanity."


"Why is the boy that makes my heart break
the same one that makes it beat faster?"

I’m the type of girl who
will fall for a guy she
barely knows; Who will
listen to a love song
&
see his face; Who will
look for him wherever she
goes. I’m the type of girl
who doesn’t get
over
things easily; Who will
beat herself up
when
someone doesn’t love her
back; Who will cry herself
to sleep cause she
feels
she’s not good enough.
But I’m also the type of
girl who’s strong; Who
can
cry her eyes out then
forbid them to come
back
the next morning; Who will
blast some
old pop song
& sing at the top of her
lungs cause she feels like it;
Who will be no one but
herself.


"And you still mean everything to her but
You're just not worth the fight anymore."


"Someone is waiting; someone who
understands exactly how you feel.
Someone is dreaming;
someone is hoping just that this will be the
day that you take your eyes off the ground,
out of the blue, & see that someone is
looking right back at you."


"She's that girl..
the one who purposely puts an away message on,
with a quote explaining exactly how she feels for you."


"I don't want to feel like this,
but I'm so tired of missing you."

All I want is one person.
One person to hold me down &
force me to say how I really feel.
One person to really care about
what I have to say. One person to
hug
me
& tell me things will be okay

   
look at life through the windshield, and 
not the rear-view mirror

take chances, alot of them. because honestly no matter where you end up and with who, it always ends up the way it should be. your mistakes make you who you are. you learn and grow with each choice you make. everything is worth it. say how you feel, always be you, and be okay with it.


He stands there, then walks away
My God, if I could only say
I'm holding every breath for you
He'd never tell you, but he can play guitar
I think he can see through everything but my heart
First thought when I wake up
Is my God, he's beautiful
So I put on my makeup
And pray for a miracle
I'd Lie_Taylor Swift

May 18th, 2007

Just thought I'd update...

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So...school's over for the spring semester. I have a week off, then I have to go back for statistics. Which is fine, I'm ready for it. It was a rough...really rough semester, but I pulled it off with 2 A's and 2 B's. So I'm happy.

I found out on Wednesday that I won a Scholorship through work that I applied for. I'm so happy. Finally working there paid off for something. Really though, it was weird having people come up and congradulate me. I feel funny when people do that, and its only the beginning for it.

If anyone ever wants to go to Chicago with me, can you please let me know! And I'm not kidding. I drove down there the other night after the coffee house just to be in the city. I love it so much. I want to go during the day and walk around and just be down there.

I dont really know what else, thats pretty much whats going on right now.
I think I'm done with this!

May 14th, 2007

yeah

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"Letting go doesn't mean giving up. It means accepting the fact that some things just weren't meant to be."

"Here's to the starry nights and careless freedom, to glowing smiles and flushed cheeks, and laughter that heals you deep inside."

"There's a huge difference between giving up and letting go. Giving up is sacrificing what was rightfully yours, and letting go is forgetting what never was."

"It's amazing how one day someone walks into your life and then you can't remember how you ever lived without them."

"She's waiting for a car to stop, a star to drop, someone to change her life."

"Some people can't believe in themselves until someone else believes in them first."


Theres always that one moment in time
we wish we could go back to.
because we know for that moment,
we were actually happy.



May 7th, 2007

More. This is what I do.

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I’m a hopeless romantic. I believe in
wishing on stars ;; soul mates and
love that never ends. But yet, sometimes
I feel like the only single person alive.
I feel so alone.
No matter what I try to do,
I’m left in solitude. Maybe I try too hard.
Maybe I really am hopeless

I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned the hard way; that some poems don't rhyme & some stories have no clear beginning, middle or end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment & making the best of it... Without knowing what will happen next.

harsh words hurt feelings, but silence breaks hearts

Why do all girls seem to fall for their friend at one point or another? It`s cause we see a great person, someone who knows us inside & out, someone who`s been there when we were down, someone who knows what makes us laugh & what makes us cry, someone who cares. We see the perfect guy in our friend. But what we don`t see is that as soon as we take that next step he will turn into someone we never knew at all, he`ll turn into the typical guy & it will all end.
 

I was over him,
I promise,
but then he looked at me
and smiled
and I fell all over
a g a i n

It’s you. You meant a lot to me. Your the first in my head in the morning when I wake up. My last thought before I go to bed. You smile at me in my dreams. When you’re sad, I feel sad and when I see your true smile, I feel incredible...like there’s no other thing around and all I can see is you.

You just dont understand do you? every time i talk to you it gets worse. the little butterflies, my stomach dropping, the spinning, the feeling like every is all right. those never stopped. they keep coming back. and no matter how many times i try to forget about you. if never helps.

 
 

Quotes.

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She always wished on stars that she would be good enough, 
but she was never good enough.


It was just one of those moments 
where you wish you had the power to freeze time 
because you felt hopeful and happy 
for the first time in a while and you were so scared that it 
would suddenly be taken away from you.

knowing that someone is wrong for you

doesn't change the way you feel

No matter who she says it to or how many times she says it,
no one will ever understand how much he means to her.

Maybe at some point in our lives,
we have to lose someone that we truly care about
because it makes us realize how strong we are;
that we can stand alone and still be oka
y

it's sweet talkers like you
that make girls fall in love and fall apart

And every time I play the song I can only think of you.
It's a shame I'll have to abandon such a beautiful song.
It's just another unwanted reminder of you.

And she looks back wishing there were no memories to remember
because some of them hurt more than she tends to show.

Never forget what he meant to you but never let him know you remember.


i remember when i first saw you
i remember the way i felt
&& you're breaking me to pieces
& i don't know how to deal with this

There's nothing more dangerous
than a boy with charm.


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I'm the type of girl who will fall for a guy she barely knows ; Who will listen to a love song and see his face ; Who will look for him wherever she goes. I'm the type of girl who doesn't get over things easily ; Who will beat herself up when someone doesn't love her back ; Who will cry herself to sleep because she feels she's not good enough. But I'm also the type of girl who is strong ; Who can cry her eyes out then forbid them to come back the next morning ; Who will blast some old pop song and sing at the top of her lungs because she feels like it ;  Who will be no one but herself."

Summer is about letting go of the past, 
forgetting that the next school year will come,
and just living in the moment with 
friends that will always be by your side.


Summertime is a couple of months that you can be yourself. 
In some way’s it can justify actions that someone would not normally do, 
they can say “oh, it was the summer” 
so be a rebel, do something that is totally crazy, 
and blame it on the heat and the summer. 
Because that’s what these months are about: 
forgetting the drama, meeting new people, 
and living life to the fullest



May 6th, 2007

This blog is to pink and happy for the mood I'm in right now. I'm just so mad at some people and hurt by others I dont know what to do anymore.

I wanna hang out with Mike...yeah well Tim and Kevin are too important, so thats never gonna happen.

I thought Heather was one of my best friends. I guess I was wrong. Shes too wrapped up with her boyfriend to even return a text message?  Yesterday and today. Screw that, I dont need it.

I feel like I chase people around. I'm done with that. I just dont care anymore.
Sometimes I think I'm too nice. I do things for people who use me for what they can get.

I need to move. I need new friends. I have like 5 that I want to keep, the rest...I dont need them.

My myspace kinda makes it look like I'm sad right now, and I guess I am, but not really.
Taking Back Sunday makes me sad
Fall Out Boy makes me forget about being sad.
It's great.


May 2nd, 2007

I write too many blogs.

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I made this for the sole purpose of not writing a million blogs a day. I guess I go through days where I want to write everything that I'm feeling at every moment.

Anyway, so much stuff has been going on its unbelievable. And of course, I've been doing a lot of thinking. School is terrible. I need it to be summer. I have never been this stressed out before. And next semester is going to be even worse. Theres just no getting out of it. I just want to get away from downers grove. I hate it here. I've been living in the same place my whole life, nothing has changed. i love my friends to death, but I'm ready to meet new people too. The friends that I have, well, I consider them my best. I dont have a million friends like some people do, I have just enough to trust.

I need to drink., well I dont need to, but I would really like to. Does that make me sound bad? Seriously, its not like I'm an alcoholic, but, I want to go out and have a good time. Its been too long since i have.

I dont like fake people. I've never hated them more than I do right now.

So my friend has a band, and they are really good, and for the last couple months, i've pretty much done a lot of stuff concerning them. Why...i dont know sometimes, but they're my friends...at least I think they are...so i do all that I can to help.

So as of lately, I've decided that I want to go to school in the city. And I will. Tonight at work, all I could think about was what the hell made me change my mind. All my life I have complained about how I hate the people down there, how I could never live there, and now I would give anything to be there right now. I owe a lot of this decsion to a friend, a friend who probably has no idea he even had anything to do with it.

Sometimes you meet people who you wish you could be like. People who just seem to have everything going for them, people who are so smart and so interesting you can sit and listen to them talk about the most random things forever and never get bored. Well yeah...I have a friend like that, and I know this sounds dumb, but I really admire him for it. He has an amazing band, hes got the common sense, talent and personality that I wish I could have. He's got so much going for him right now, and hes lucky enough to be in the city going to school. Now, I know I've only known him for like 2 months, but I've really learned alot about myself and the things I want to do. He's that kinda person who you can talk to about stuff and he'll make you think. I dont have many friends who do that. And I really look up to him because of it. Never before have I actually taken the time to look at my passion for music as much as I am now. It's funny how someone, without even knowing it can have an impact on your life.

....problem is, I can get obnoxious sometimes. Sometimes to the point where people dont want to talk to me anymore. And I think I may have done that again.

I kinda feel like a kid right now, writing about someone they look up to. I'm not a kid, I'm just glad I have a friend like him.

so, even if you think I'm crazy cuz I wrote this,
thanks for being my friend kid, I know I may annoy the hell out of you sometimes, but its good knowing I have a friend like you to talk to.

March 4th, 2007

For now.

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“On the way home,
this car hears my confessions.
I think tonight I'll take the long way.”
- The Sharp Hint of New Tears

All her life she's been waiting for the right boy to come along; 
ever since she started watching the princess movies, the ones where princes come and take the princess away and they live happily ever after. Yeah shes starting to believe
there's no such thing.

Never be at a loss for words but find the one who leaves you speechless. Have a deep conversation at 2 a.m. get thrown out of bars. Never get enough sleep. Be you. Fall in love, be destroyed by love, and swear that you'll never love again but know that you are lying to yourself. Be confused. Have everyone else's lives figured out but your own. Drink too much. Make the best out of the worst situation. Be confident. Realize that you're gonna get hurt sometimes, but never show it. Search for meaning, search for happiness. Refuse to settle. Stay out till the sun rises, just because you can. Take risks.

and i'd give up forever to touch you,
cause i know that you feel me somehow
your the closest to heaven
that i'll ever be
and i don't wanna go home right now.


"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."


YOU GOT TO ME, IN A WAY
words can't describe

i just want everything she's got
ooh, ooh, you look at her so amazed
tell me what makes her so much better than me
what makes her just everything that i can never be
what makes her your every dream and fantasy





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